I have always been one whose money “burns a hole in their pocket.” I don’t know why it is so exciting to spend money and buy things, but something about it just feels good! As a functioning adult, I recognize that this is not a sustainable practice and have spent a good chunk of time assessing my habits and learning about my relationship with money as part of my lifestyle wellness endeavors. 

There are four aspects of financial wellness that I believe to be very important: awareness, beliefs, priorities, and systems. As a highly emotional human (one of my superpowers, thank you very much), it has been especially important to learn about my beliefs and feelings connected to money. While it may seem silly, we all have feelings attached to money. Addressing my feelings and beliefs about money has directed me towards appropriate practices: it has helped me identify priorities and construct systems that match my needs. 

AWARENESS 

It is very hard to experience financial wellness without being intimately aware of your financial situation. It is vitally important to know how much is coming in and how much is going out, and to balance that with whatever your current circumstances are. It may sound idiotically simple, but I know that sometimes when things get tough, it is tempting to opt for the “ignorance is bliss” route, but with finances, that usually leads to more trouble.

Awareness also helps expose beliefs around money. As you start tuning into the details of your finances, try to pay attention to how you feel about, react to, and communicate about money in different situations. 

BELIEFS

Sometimes money is just money. Sometimes money represents your ideas of freedom, success, status, power, stability, and opportunity, among many other things. Everyone has feelings about money, whether they acknowledge them or not. There is no need to feel silly or guilty about having these feelings. They exist for a reason and deserve to be examined and integrated into your financial wellness approach. 

This is actually a HUGE topic in and of itself. I really like the way Kate Levinson explains it in her book, Money As Emotional Currency, where she acts as a guide to explore beliefs and associations with money. She says, “on the surface, our relationship to money appears straightforward and uncomplicated: either we have enough of it or we don’t. But there are few subjects as emotionally charged, deeply personal, and culturally complex as money. In order to have a full relationship with it, we need to understand money as both tangible and symbolic as well as recognize our responses to it as both emotional and rational.” It is worth spending some time unearthing these beliefs, if it is uncharted territory, or dig a little deeper if you’ve already broken ground. Sometimes our biggest financial obstacles are in our heads and can be more smoothly navigated with some intentional inner work. 

PRIORITIES & COMMUNICATION

I have learned to express myself financially in terms of priorities, rather than saying I can or cannot “afford” something. I find it to be the simplest way to cut through the differing emotions around money when trying to communicate with others. 

In order to communicate my priorities, I’ve first had to identify them. I think the first time intentionally thinking through these priorities is the most emotional and time intensive, but it gets easier to reevaluate as things change. For example, some of my current priorities are to buy high quality groceries, to own things that I value and that feel useful, and embracing quality over quantity.

In practical terms, Manisha Thakor, a financial advisor, suggests budgeting in terms of priorities and percentages: 50% towards needs, 30% towards wants, and 20% towards savings. We can start to blend our emotional and practical minds by using these guidelines and figuring out our individual priorities within each category. 

SYSTEMS

Using intentional awareness, exploring my beliefs, and acknowledging my priorities have helped me design simple systems for my finances that work for my needs and circumstances. The traditional “just make a budget” system does not match my needs and I obviously can’t let the “burning pocket money” mentality run the show. Instead, I use a combination of spreadsheets, a spending tracker within my banking app, direct deposits, auto-payments, a jar for my coins, cash stuffed in my sock drawer, and the ol’ “take $20 to the farmer’s market and see how much I can buy” game. It works for me and it is ever-evolving: growing as my circumstances change and as I continue learning and expanding my financial horizons. Establishing consistent yet flexible systems has given me a solid foundation to feel secure and steady in my wellbeing and in my interactions with the world. 

As is often the case with health coaching, my intention is to draw your attention to an area of life that is sometimes overlooked and, although not intuitively associated with health, hugely impactful on our well-being. This month I encourage you to take some time to observe your interactions with money. Tap into your awareness, get curious and playful, try doing things differently and see how it feels! Observe your reactions to money coming in and money going out to explore your beliefs, and use your findings to adjust and improve the systems that you already have in place. 

Good luck out there, financial explorers!

Resources: 

Want to explore your personal relationship with money? Read the book: Money As Emotional Currency by Dr. Kate Levinson. 

Looking for practical tips? Read the book: On My Own Two Feet by Manisha Thakor. 

Further resources for a variety of circumstances: https://moneyzen.com/resources/ 

Originally posted October 15, 2021.